I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
