I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
