Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
She said her name was "party"
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize
