I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
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