help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
