The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize