it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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