Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
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