there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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