I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize
