She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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