Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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