to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
