and you said cock pushups were impossible
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize
