I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
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