Buhtt sex?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
so much tequila, so little girl.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
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