You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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