You smell like stripper and shame
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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