Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Randomize