reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
