he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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