My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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