? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
he wants to bone in the snuggie
I cut my penus on the lid.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
