Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
