My sheets look like a crime scene.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
