he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
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