Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
