i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize