He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
