in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
