Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
ugly people sure do ruin things
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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