grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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