You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I touched a dick in church today
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
