I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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