I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
