You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
