is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Randomize
