32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
