i always forget guys have bellybuttons
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
