i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
