And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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