is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
