My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
