It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
