Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
