no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
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