i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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