Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
