HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Randomize
