i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
