There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Randomize