so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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